A Joke - 2

The amusing thing about doing a blog is that you get to see which are the most popular posts. For my blog the post viewed most often is the Joke Post. My motto is, give the people what they want. The problem is that I couldn't find any jokes I liked, or were line related. So I decided to write one from scratch. My previous joke was one that I rewrote around the punch line. I'm not a professional at this sort of thing, so I beg your indulgence.

Here goes.

At a cocktail party there were three male professors quite smitten by a Blond lady. (My wife says blond jokes are sexist, but I suppose you could switch the genders around if it bothers you). All four of these people had escaped to the balcony of the house and were gazing up at the heavens. At least the blond was. The men were sneaking glances at the woman and trying to be the one to catch her attention.

One of the professors' subject is English and he fancies himself as a bit of a poet. He was casting about for a poetical line comparing her blue eyes to the stars (or were they green or darn it were they brown. It was too dark outside to see the color now. If only he had made a note of the color inside). Because of his confusion about the color of her eyes, his poetical line came out, “I say, look at those two stars, you could draw a line between them.”

The woman looked at the two bright points of light in the sky and replied, “Oh, you're right. Cool.” The poet was please with his success, smiled and looked directly at her.

On the other side of the blond stood another professor whose subject is Mathematics. He too had been trying to think of something clever to say to get the woman's attention. However he had been distracted by the woman's bosom. Unfortunately he was reminded that he had a paper on Conics he was suppose to be working on. When he heard the poets remark, he was annoyed that the blond could show interest in such a silly observation. Two points determine a line, so you could draw a line between any two stars. He stewed on his thoughts while fingering a piece of chalk in his jacket pocket. “Hmmm,” was all he could say.

Close, but not too close behind the woman stood the other professor. He is an Astronomer. He too had been trying to think of a good line. He thought he had found it, “How would you like to come up to the observatory? You could take a look at my telescope.” He was about to utter this amazingly good line when he remembered that he hadn't reserved any viewing time and one of his colleagues was using the telescope that night. Then the poet had scored his success. Darn! The poet's remark had been so stupid too. The two stars were actually the planets Venus and Jupiter. “Hmmm,” was all he could say.

Meanwhile, the blond had been bored to tears with the men and had tried to get away from them by coming out on the balcony. Now the poet had really annoyed her with his remark. Did he think she was stupid. And the other two men were just as bad with those smug “Hmmms”. In anger she step back, the heel of one shoe crushing one of the Astronomer's pinkie toes. She spun around and strode to the door back to the house.

Before disappearing into the party she turned back and said, "You men always think you are so smart. Well I'm not dumb. Of course you can't draw a line between those two stars. They are too far away!"

The men were left even more speechless than before.

There it is... When I was in high school I read a science fiction story that told the tale of the search for the origin of the first joke. All jokes were derived from a common joke, or so the story would have it. In the story this first joke was of alien origin. I'll call it the Eve Joke. It was probably a blond joke too.

Jonathan